Did you know that all the power to improve your life lies in your hands, and only your hands? Why do not you use it more then? Perhaps because human beings have the tendency to forget that they are ultimately responsible for their own lives? It is so much easier to tell ourselves that when things don’t turn out as we want them to, it is the fault of others or events.

However, our success depends only on ourselves! Of course, some are born rich, others poor. Some have suffered a lot and others less. Success does not depend on chance or fate. It depends on our ability to dream, to take action and persevere even when we fail.

You need to develop the ability to make yourself depend on your own potential to take responsibility for the results you get in your life. Whenever you blame others, you give yourself excuses for doing nothing; every time you criticize a person unnecessarily or situation, you suffer. Without knowing it, you reject the phenomenal power that you have on your life.

Whenever you listen to your fears, when you say that success is not for you, you suffer. Whenever you are unwilling to go beyond a lack of will, you suffer. You cannot indulge in your own weaknesses and let others choose events and opportunities for you to get what you want!

Imagine you are driving a car and this car is your life. Not taking responsibility for your life is to remain in the passenger seat. Sure, you “drive” your life sometimes. But the goal is to always be in the driver’s seat.

When you do not take responsibility for your life, you perceive yourself as a victim. You remain passive and convince yourself that you have nothing to hope for. Instead of climbing to the top of your life, you let yourself be buried ever deeper by inaction.

You end up feeling incapable, powerless. You lock yourself in the prison that you make for yourself. Your newspaper loses its attraction and the pleasure of living decreases. Over time, the conviction of your permanent uselessness and lack of meaning can even make you want to die.

To escape this prison and empower yourself, you must identify areas of your life over which you have power. When you criticize others, or rehash past events that you cannot change, you focus your precious energies on unnecessary concerns.

It is very easy to focus on unnecessary areas, but unfortunately it generates negative emotions. Instead, you should focus your efforts on what you really control. This area covers all your life that you can change, starting with yourself.

As Alexander Graham Bell said, when one door closes, another door opens. The problem is that we mourn for too long the door that closed and we fail to look at new opportunities before us.

In other words, we focus on unnecessary concerns rather than act on what we can control. The more we focus on what we can control, the more we increase the power we have over our own lives and stop wasting our efforts.

Stop complaining about everything that does not please you! This only serves to maintain your sense of outrage and helplessness. Instead of swimming against the tide, against anything that does not satisfy you, use the strengths of the current to direct you and move faster in the direction of your dreams! Here are some examples to help you clearly define the difference between these two core “zones” of your life:

Self-Empowerment

  • Setting goals
  • Feeding your personal vision
  • Being creative
  • Learning
  • Preventing and managing conflicts

Self-Disempowerment

  • Believing that we cannot improve
  • Speaking against others
  • Remaining passive
  • Complaining
  • Wanting others to think like us