Is not it only natural that every child be born into a family with parents who wish it, love it, stay around it and cuddle it? Yet each year, around the world, thousands of children are born in a context of abandonment. Meanwhile, many parents want more than anything, a family. Whether for reasons of infertility or by personal choice, some are turning to adoption.
An adoption can fill the vacuum of three hearts
From the outset, let us tell you, adoption cannot be done by anyone who wants it. Prospective parents must first undergo a psychosocial assessment, which is conducted by a social worker or psychologist appointed by the government. Depending on the year, we can say that 5% of applications are rejected, while 15% are modified or deferred. This procedure aims to minimize failure. Adoption is a serious step. We are talking about giving a second chance to a child who is already sorely tried by life. Should there be a failure, the second fall can have very serious consequences for the child.
Despite these precautions, some adoption cases end badly. When this happens, it is often because prospective parents are unprepared for what awaits them. The reason is simple: they lack resources. As proof, enter into any bookstore and look for a book on pregnancy, childbirth or the early years of a child’s life and you’ll be spoiled for choice. Search now for books on adoption – you will find that it is not easy! There are very few resources for parents who want to adopt!
In this regard, a reader confides: “Awaiting the arrival of my son, I attended various conferences and I read what I found on the subject. Yet when my son arrived, I had a huge shock! My child was in very bad shape and showed a significant delay at all levels. I was worried and felt alone. So, I needed to talk with parents who had similar experiences, share, and be reassured!”Eventually, every day, she overcame her fears and has learned to tame this little ray of sunshine, now in perfect health. Over time, moments of pure joy and wonder were so great that she even chose to adopt another child, this time, a girl.
Never mind that she has not forgotten the anguish and questioning in the early stages. This explains the many steps of the highly bureaucratic pre-adoption and waiting, travel to fetch the child, what to put in his suitcase, the encounter with the child’s return. Do not forget the various physical and psychological problems that these children can express after their arrival (night terrors, attachment disorder, eating disorders, etc.).
To adopt is to engage in the biggest project of our lifetime without a control all the hazards. Is to accept the child and be ready to do anything for a child who does not necessarily correspond to the vision we had created during the wait. Adopting a child is an immense privilege of serving as a relay for life and become the father or the mother of a treasure forever. The purpose of my book is not to discourage parents from adopting, but to equip them so that this adventure goes as smoothly as possible!
Although 80% of annual adoptions take place outside the country, the fact remains that 20% of them are held here. In most cases, the foster family who adopts the child cares for and houses it for a while. Anyway, a child is a child, whether American, Haitian or Chinese. When there is a little treasure waiting to be loved, there should be no boundaries.